Why did the Hashers cross the road?
For the beer, dumbasses, it was for the beer!!!
The Choked Chicken Hash is Saturday, August 30th, and On-Outs from O’Toole’s in New Haven at 3:00 PM HST. Or 3:15, or whenever the hell we damn well feel like it. But definitely before 3:30. Okay, 4:00, tops.
The gist? Collect one of four Choked Chickens, be the first to cross the literal Chicken Road, and win delicious booze. What could be more goddam glorious than that (other than being forced to Down Down because you exhibited r*cist behavior in your clamor to collect choked chickens!)?
Hares Don’tYouDareCloseYourEyes and Just Linda promise a relatively flat and urban trail with a Beer Check, at least one On The Foot and a newly-introduced Beer Quest Check! There also may or may not be a little Shiggy that will make you long for the winter Hashes where there are no noxious weeds to take issue with your tender and unprotected shins.
Trail is A to A-ish (did you read this, STFU? A to A-ish! I swear to god you’d better not lead hot yoga-pants-wearing-virgins to a false On-In again or we’ll have to beat you speechless!!!). Trail is most definitely not strollerable (I’ve yet to see a stroller on trail) but somewhat dog-friendly (depending upon whether your dog sees other dogs as peers or as snacks). Roughly four miles, depending upon whether we get you lost or not.
Hash Cash is $5 (cheap), and it would be very cool if you let us know you were cumming so we could stock up on enough beer and other tasty beverages. Park east of State Street so you don’t gotta feed the meter. And as always, we encourage you to wear new shoes.
One Choked Chicken per Hasher, please, unless you subscribe to the “There are no rules in Hashing” theory. Oh, and when referring to “Dumbasses” above I in no way meant to infer or imply that your ass had less intellect than the common ass, or that said ass should be the subject of ridicule or even snide remarks and pointed fingers behind your back. Honest.
Hey! Skull and Boners Hashers! This is your opportunity to tune up your Mad Hashing Skilz before the Mud-And-Blood-Fest on Sunday, August 31st! Join us and form fond memories of a Hash that doesn’t have you praying for redemption (and, most certainly, fewer leeches).